Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Free Lunch

Happy Saint Paddy's Day, everyone. Sláinte.

I've been slothful in my posts of late. Apologies for that.

I just got word that three poems have been accepted for publication in Main Street Rag, and will probably appear in print early next year. The three are Grandma's on Facebook, Paper, and Virtual/Reality. Since MSR only accepts previously unpublished poetry, they won't be showing up on the blog.

I have now written 15 poems about or inspired by Facebook, and to celebrate the first acceptance of a Facebook poem (which is actually the most recent, fifteenth poem), here is a revised version of my first Facebook poem, which I read at the Sacrificial Poets open mike two weeks ago at Flyleaf Books in Chapel Hill.

The title of the poem is timely because this week Qdoba emailed me a coupon for a free burrito, in honor of my birthday this month. I don't even have to defriend anybody to use it.


Free Lunch

I have defriended you. Nothing personal,
just like it wasn’t all that personal
accepting your invitation in the first place.
Promiscuous in my friending then,
and since we had five friends in common,
and despite the vaguest idea of who you were,
I accepted.

But now I have defriended you.
I still don’t really know who you are,
though I see your status updates regularly:
looking forward to the weekend,
sipping wine now that the kids are in bed,
watching Steel Magnolias for the thirteenth time.
People I don’t know post Farmville requests and stickers
and Bejeweled Blitz scores on your wall,
share comments on Gossip Girl and Doctor McDreamy,
tag you to answer 25 personal questions
about things I really don’t want to know.

Burger King will give a free Whopper
to defriend ten Facebook friends.
Let’s face it, it’s a stretch to call you a friend,
making this a true freebie.
Tomorrow while I’m eating my Whopper,
I’ll enjoy it as much as ever, probably more,
since it’s free. No guilt. No one will know
I earned it by defriending ten friends.
Not to say that you are worth no more
than a tenth of a fast food sandwich,
but there’s no denying your friendship
is worth less than that to me.

&&